Have you ever wanted a job where all you had to do was watch a button? A button you were told to never ever touch, under any circumstance? Then hey, I’ve got the perfect job for you! Or at least game.
Please, Don’t Touch Anything is a game about just that – watching a button. The guy who normally does it needs to go to the bathroom and leaves you in charge. Now, do you choose to be the responsible person and obey, or do you disobey and press it? Trust me – it feels a lot more rewarding to press it. Sometimes you just have to disobey!
Please, Don’t Touch Anything is a pretty basic game on the surface. The main premise is that you can do a large multitude of things on your control panel that lead to different endings. The clues for these endings are there on the screen, though you’ll need to decipher them to figure it out.
You’ll have to figure out between the tools eventually handed to you – typically by multiple presses of the button – what you need to do. I ended up having to pull out a guide to get through parts of some solutions as I just couldn’t figure them out myself, but with enough time and energy you can too.
If you were a fan of Papers, Please – a game I highly suggest playing as it is – then this game also has a nice little tribute to it. One of the random things that can come up is the passport to stamp. It fits too, seeing as this game is pretty much the same graphical style as Papers, Please. Nice, simplistic, and fitting. The sound is the same way too, with it getting a bit more intense once you choose to press that darn button.
Whether you choose to smash it with a hammer, take the screwdriver to various parts of the console, or just be good and do nothing, then this game will provide some nice short burst entertainment for you. While it is something you could easily quickly power through with a guide, I suggest just picking it up occasionally and working on a few endings.
Oh and just so you know – that point where the game crashes? That’s on purpose. I was a bit freaked out when that happened, but it really is just on purpose. If you think about it overall, it makes sense. Unfortunately, when you come back from the “crash”, it seems to forget your window size settings, or at least it did for me. Easy to fix, just a bit awkward.
Please, Don’t Touch Anything Review Score
Great for short-burst entertainment, though easy to just power through in a few hours should you choose to.